Middlesex, Essex And Sussex

It seems Pakistan’s Information Minister Pervaiz Rashid is suffering from a severely debilitating dilemma – one that interferes with his ability to perform his duty. While talking about Imran Khan and his sons’ education, the Information Minister was unable to inform the parliament what he was talking about, for he could not say a certain word. That word is “sex” – or more specifically the place called Middlesex in England – for if he said it, he would have to perform an extensive ablution to cleanse himself. One shudders to think about the rigours he would have to go through if he came up against words like “rape”, “vaginal mutilation” or “lesbian”. We don’t begrudge him his moral standards, we just need an information minister that can talk about issues related to human sexuality, or at least utter those words without sheepishly giggling like a schoolboy studying reproduction for the first time in biology class.

The Information Minister undeniably made a fool of himself – and gave the denizens of twitter hours upon hours of fun as they merrily mocked his antics. Yet the fact that his actions were motivated more by political reasons than moral ones makes them all the more reprehensible. In an attempt to discredit Imran Khan – who is hounding the government for corruption – the minister went after his sons. Finding nothing there, he decided to make fun of the university they studied in based on its name. Which begs the question; is there any depth PML-N won’t sink to in the bid to defend its own wrongdoing? First the protest outside Jemima’s house and now this – this isn’t valid political criticism, it is tabloid and crass expediency.

The Prime Minister didn’t seem very ministerial after the Panama leaks – now he seems downright thuggish as his party has gone after Imran Khan’s family; that too by playing on the word “sex”. It would be interesting to see what the Information Minister has to say about Nawaz Sharif’s upcoming trip to Lower Topa near Murree.

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