Duty towards parents
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In Surah Bani Israel, verse 23, Allah after exhorting mankind to worship Him alone, says, ...And that ye be kind
to parents, whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel
them but address them in terms of honour.
The positioning of these words in the verse, where Allah having ordained worship only to Himself, chooses to
instruct how parents are to be dealt with, is quite significant; for in the scheme of Allah, anybody who worships
Him alone, has to necessarily be kind and grateful to ones parents. It is indeed incomprehensible that a true
Muslim, will ever even imagine being disrespectful to parents.
A baby, upon arrival, is totally dependent, despite presence of all the blessed faculties, that in later years allows
for growing strength and understanding, but at that moment, these faculties are of no use. Only a mother would
sacrifice her peace and midnight sleep, to ensure that her offspring on the contrary would sleep comfortably and
calmly. Approaching parents with utmost humility is a cardinal principle of Islam- no remonstration or words of
'fie to any of their demands, barring invitation to disbelief, is permissible. In acknowledgement and recognition
to the service of parents towards their children, this beautiful verse, ends with a supplication, seeking Allahs
mercy on them just as they (parents) cherished the children in their childhood.
We have enjoined on man, kindness to parents, but if they (either of them) strive to force thee to join with me in
worship. Anything of which thou hast no knowledge, obey them not (XXIX: 8). Obedience towards parents has
been in very clear terms made subservient, to the cause of worshipping none, but the True One Allah. These
verses clearly establish that, anybody including parents, if they ever beguilth their progeny from the path of Allah
they are to be disobeyed and disassociated with.
In Islam, the stature of parents is placed on the highest pedestal of good behaviour. Besides respecting and
showing kindness to ones own parents, it is incumbent for Muslims to show similar respect and kindness to
parents of even our friends and friends of our parents. Abdullah bin Umar, in consonance with Allahs apostles
statement, that the finest act of goodness on the part of a son is to treat kindly the loved ones of his father, was
always gracious towards the friends of Hazrat Umar bin Khattab.
In verse 15 of Surah Ahqaf, the stature of the mother is recognised. We have enjoined on man, kindness to his
parents; in pain did his mother bear him and in pain did she give birth to him. (XLVI: 15) and further, at length,
when he reaches the age of full strength and attains forty years, he says, O my lord, grant me that I may be
grateful for thy favour, which thou hast bestowed upon me and upon both my parents and that I may work
righteousness (XLVI: 15). Abu Huraira has reported that a person asked, Allahs messenger, who amongst the
people is the most deserving of my good treatment? He said: your mother, again your mother, again your
mother, then your father, then your relatives according to the order of nearness. In Sahih Muslim, it is reported
(6814), Abdullah Bin Amar said that a person came to Allahs apostle (Pbuh) and sought permission to
participate in jihad, where upon, the prophet said: you should put in your best efforts in their service. In Surah
Luqman, verse 14, Allah says, show gratitude to me and thy parents; to me thy final Goal. (XXXI:14).
Blessed are children, whose parents are living- Allah Subhanahu Tala offers them, an opportunity to be of
gracious service to them. Allah exhorts in the same verse to show gratitude to Him and parents- Oh What
stature parents have Imagine a society that respects, loves and shows gratitude to parents, it is inevitable that
such offspring will usher peace, tolerance, equity and justice in their system. O Muslims, never say 'fie to
parents- fear Allah. Gratitude to parents must manifest itself in the quality of service, children need to perform.
Ingratitude as a trait of character, invokes the anger and displeasure of almighty Allah. Unfortunately human
history is replete with tales of ingratitude. Blow, Blow thou winter wind, thou art not so unkind, as mans
ingratitude. (Shakespeare)