Leaders' role

ADNAN GILL Pakistan is cursed in many ways; ruined economy, extremism, frequent bombings, rampant corruption, religious and ethnic divisions, feudalism, on-and-off military rules, corrupt bureaucracy, but the worst: unscrupulous politicians. The rudderless PPP government's rank inefficiencies range from failure to deliver most basic services like electricity and food, to failing to protect the public. Since President Zardari - the undisputed leader of the NRO club - took the reigns of power from Musharraf, no one can tell head from the tail. Just when seas appear to be calming down for clear sailing, somehow the presidency manages to steer up a storm. Its blundering decisions, like the renegade signed pledges and the judges' issue, have earned it utter embarrassment and notoriety of the worst kind. Latest feather in president's cap is an odd speech (pun intended) he delivered from the depths of his bunker. Laced with strange references to ambulances and conspiracies, the president forewarned the American passport holders. Stuttering, he glanced side to side, as if he was addressing a huge crowd. Ironically, his audience was a lone TV camera. Such theatrics must tease the inquisitive minds over the intellectual capacity of his advisors. Anywhere else in the world, the security chief of an assassinated dignitary would have been serving tables at some obscure truck-stop, if not serving jail-time. But only in PPP, a person - another proud member of the illustrious NRO club - who miserably failed to perform his duties is rewarded with a national Cabinet position. Cognisant of the criteria of promotions in the government, the calibre of the presidential advisors could be easily comprehended. The president's grasp on foreign policy is equally remarkable. Only his choice to run the Pakistani embassy in Washington could reflect his policy faux pas after faux pas. Pakistanis fondly call the envoy, the 'American Ambassador'. The ambassador - yet another elite member of the NRO club - never misses an opportunity to belittle Pakistanis over the virtues of wagging the tail on queue. Among his glaring accomplishments, he is widely considered to be the author of Kerry-Lugar Bill. Yet another of Zardari's cigar-smoking ambassador - you guessed it, another cardholding member of the NRO club - is caught hauling boxes in a third country. Perhaps he was on secret green mission of recycling court papers. President Zardari's pledge of no-first-use of nuclear weapons, his generous peace offering of his ISI chief to the Indians, his disclosure that India never threatened Pakistan, and the way he gallantly gave in to every embarrassing condition the Americans demanded to toss few dollars in his beginning bowl, should have earned him the Nobel Peace Prize. But who knew, President Obama would swindle what should have been Zardari's prize. Rumour is the Nobel committee valued Obama's credibility over Zardari's brilliant dog and pony shows. Sources also divulged, it was the American passport holders and the brotherhood Zardari entrusted to investigate his wife's assassination, who hatched the conspiracy to deny him the well-deserved prize. For its part, the supposed opposition, under the astute leadership of Nawaz Sharif, is quite rapidly mastering the art of what little girls call, "Barbie and the tea party." The jealous ones recall it as, "you scratch my back and I'll scratch yours, party." Apparently, Barbie's favourite playmate is Zardari. Like any good friend, he always brings irresistible offers to the party for Barbie. When some complained, the road to Barbie's wonderland is too narrow and bumpy. "Why worry when the Punjab government could build a brand-new multilane highway to the wonderland," said Shahbaz Sharif. How many storms the Zardari government could weather, remains to be seen. One can already see the incompetence induced cracks in the foundations of his government; even the slightest tremors could reduce his fiefdom to rubble. Naturally, Pakistanis wonder what have we done to be cursed with such an incompetent and self-serving leadership? The writer is a freelance columnist based in the US.

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