I would think Mian Nawaz Sharif got bail because his son-in-law is a retired captain. Under the PTI, how could we have a retired officer in jail? Still, Mian Nawaz’s release by the Islamabad High Court has caused some adverse comment on the judge concerned, Mr Justice Athar Minallah. He might remember the fate of Mr Justice K.M.A. Samdani of the Lahore High Court, who granted bail to Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto under the Zia Martial Law. He was removed under the PCO. Closer to home, Mr Justice Minallah might remember how his own maternal grandfather, Mr Justice Safdar Ali Shah, was removed from the Supreme Court because he had produced fake academic certificates, and went into exile to Kabul.

The real reason was that he noted that there was no precedent for a death sentence to be upheld when the Supreme Court was divided in its judgement on the conviction. And the Supreme Court upheld the conviction 4-3 (Mr Justice Shah among the minority). Mr Justice Shah’s sin was saying as much to the BBC. And by the way, that decision confirming the death sentence has never been quoted.

Mian Nawaz can be forgiven for not wearing a curly fright wig for his release, because he was doing time on a charge of not being able to explain the London flats, not murder. Presumably he kept back the long black kurta and black dhoti (with black pumps to complete the ensemble) for Ashura, which he commemorated as a free man (well, a convict on bail, but he was out of jail.) Was it because of his release that the police failed to turn off the Internet? They only turned off mobile phones. Haven’t they heard of IP telephony? Well, I’d better shut up before they think of it for Eid Milad.

Now that’s a sign of how the times have changed. Imran Khan must be a disappointed man, for even to Madina barefoot doesn’t seem to have worked. The Saudis cannot have had anything to do with the release, or else they would have given us some money, or free oil, or something. As the Saudis are tight with the Americans these days, one must suppose that Imran was firmed up.

The Saudis are also making overtures to the Indians, and so are we. Is it purely a coincidence that Pakistan went down to India in the Asia Cup in Dubai, with a former skipper so near? And then there is the loss to India at hockey in the Asian Games in Jakarta. Look, Imran of all people should not tolerate losses to India on his watch. Or is this diplomacy at work? Remember, these victories are grist to Narendra Modi’s mill. It’s another matter that once upon a time, India used to play Pakistan in the final of the World Cup, the Olympics or the Asia Cup, not for the Asian bronze, like this time.

So seriously, it seems, does Pakistan take sport, that Pakistan only beat India at snooker, and India cancelled the Foreign Ministers’ talks they had just agreed to. This prompted Imran to say he had never seen such petty people hold office, which might mean that his next dharna will be in New Delhi.

Of course, Imran is also involved with the courts. To the extent that he also wants dams built, like the Chief Justice of Pakistan, Mr Justice Saquib Nisar. Mr Justice Nisar has gone to the extent of saying that anyone against dams could face a treason charge. That might sound like a serious threat, but it really isn’t. I mean, Gen (retd) Pervez Musharraf was charged with treason, but has the trial been completed? It was during the trial that he got to go abroad, didn’t he? But someone might point out that he was head of the Army, and a civilian would get it in the neck…

Still, you’ve Imran working to avoid that fate. One of the things he’s tried is to sell off the PM House buffaloes. That, plus the sale of the cars, have not gathered enough money to build the dams, so we’ve had a mini-budget, not to forget a hefty gas price increase. The only idea I can see behind the last is that people might whiff a bit for a while, but when the dams are built, they’ll be happy enough to bathe with cold water. Imran knows, for he still remembers that his dharna participants were desperate enough for a clean toilet that they attacked PTV.

Imran would probably look with admiration to how the Mahathir government has slapped another 25 charges, for money laundering, on Najib Razak, PM till he lost the June election. The charges are connected to the 1MDB fund scandal, involving Razak having a billion ($555 million) too many, and which he claims were a Saudi Arabian donation. Now that’s the way to treat ex-PMs. If Mian Nawaz was to have more charges brought against him, surely he would be arrested on those charges, bail or no bail. The best thing would be to stop these new-fangled NAB charges, and go for the good old, tried and tested, buffalo theft charge. The disappearance can surely be shown of a buffalo from PM House at the time he was sacked by the Supreme Court. And it can be shown that under cover of night, Mian Nawaz was seen leading it away, assisted by Kh Saad Rafiq and Khwaja Asif. Anything involving buffaloes, whether sale or theft, should be settled by the PM’s wife, who belongs to a Wattoo family, and thus enjoys ancestry of people devoted to pastoral farming.

I wonder that Imran has not demanded psychiatric tests for Mariam Nawaz, which have been ordered for Marine Le Pen, the head of France’s Rassemblement National. He’s done what he can, having placed her and her father on the ECL to make sure they didn’t take away national wealth in their baggage at the  very first Cabinet meeting he chaired. But how further to make sure that looters and plunderers are made to pour their ill-gotten gains into the Dam Fund? Failure to do so should mean having your head examined.