Desecration, Drones and DSPs

Perhaps we have been too bemused by the World Cup to pay attention to Raymond Davis affair, which has been forgotten. Perhaps there is a strange appropriateness in the fact that leading the fading protests was the man who was captain of the 1992 World Cup, Imran Khan. As for Pakistans chances, they depend on whether or not Shahid Afridi wants to build a hospital. Shoaib Akhtar wants to build one and is also retiring, but has Imran been exhausted as the next PM-in-waiting? The way Asghar Khan has been, with the result that Imran took on the mantle. As none of the other countries wants a military coup, only Pakistan might win. As none of the other countries make the Cricket World Cup winning captain a potential PM, only Pakistan has a right to the World Cup, provided Shahid Afridi is willing to eat organic food. But if Shoaib Akhtar is going to nightclubs to spread Islam (where Imran had gone when he met his future wife), Afridi had better watch out. Because that means he not only wont win the World Cup, but he wont be the next future PM, no matter how many hospitals he builds. After the quarters, its clear that the Asians have taken over cricket, hat with Asian teams getting three of the four semi-finals, and if one is permitted the right amount of racism, the New Zealanders are sort of Asians, both by virtue of being the Black Caps as well as the many jokes made about them by their neighbours across the Tasman Strait. Bangladesh has been left out, possibly through no fault of their own. Its funny how the advertisers are all set to push their horrible concoctions or terrible services, from the present set of semis. There does seem to be one problem though. And that is that the Pakistan team might be burnt alive. That is the disadvantage of them having reached the semifinal. Some bright spark in the Shiv Sena worked it out at the beginning of the tournament that India and Pakistan would come across each other in the semifinal. Sena chief Bal Thackeray threatened to stop the match, and now he has to put up or shut up. And the only way he can stop our boys is if he has them burnt alive. Because if they beat India, that would be enough, and there would be no need for Afridi to win the World Cup to be eligible as PM under the military. This would be very disappointing to the Foreign Office, not so much because its Man in New Delhi would have to deal with the deaths of so many Pakistani citizens, but because it would probably mean an end to the 'cricket diplomacy opportunity created by the match. Anyone remember the last cricket diplomacy between President Ziaul Haq and Prime Minister Rajiv Gandhi? Both are now dead, but their diplomacy worked to the extent that the two countries didnt let Brass Tacks, the great Indian Army exercise, lead to a war. Zia was apparently a bigger cricket fan rather than Gilani, for he invited himself to a bilateral ODI, while Gilani has been invited for a World Cup semi. If Zia is anything to go by, well, when he went, Pakistan won. And this is a much more important match. But remember, back in 1987, neither reported back to anyone. Now Gilani reports to the President, and his host, Manmohan Singh, to Rajivs widow. Now if the team is burnt alive there wont be a match, nor any diplomacy. Burning Muslims alive is perhaps the next step after the desecration by burning of the Holy Quran in Florida. That showed that either the USA fully backed him, or the state of Florida has run out of fat DSPs. DSPs were probably used the last time, when the same desecrater was in action in the winter, because while nobody listens to the President, everyone listens to local policemen, especially if they have reached the rank of DSP (or its Florida equivalent) while being grossly overweight, well beyond the limits prescribed by police regulations. And isnt that why we are fighting the War on Terror, and merely do our best to grin and bear it when CIA operatives come into our cities and start shooting, not satisfied with the havoc that is being wreaked in the tribal areas by it through the Predator missile strikes, the missiles being mounted on Drone Unmanned Aerial Vehicles, the pilotless planes of science fiction now made reality? So that desecration can be committed with impunity in the name of the god of freedom of speech, we having abandoned The One True God of the Quran for the false gods of freedoms. Try and say anything against those gods, and youll be accused of 'endangering the system quicker than you could say 'Jack Robinson. And it should be noted that, since Raymond Davis was released, not only have Drone attacks been extended to jirgas, but the Florida pastor sprung into action. Not only is the mind behind both actions thoroughly mean, but also vengeful. The USA is apparently not satisfied that its man has been released, but it wants to make the point that it is supreme, and can do what it wants, whenever it wants, and so can its citizens.