The young man looked per­plexed. So did I when he asked me a couple of ques­tions I never reflected on dur­ing my 35 years in the For­eign Office. To protect his career, I shall not reveal his name. However, this bright fellow has start­ed his career in the Min­istry of Foreign Affairs after clearing the Central Superior Services (CSS) exam recently. This was his second visit to me. A few years back, he came to me to understand the dynam­ics of the CSS exam as well as the foreign policy of Pakistan. He did well in the exam and got his first choice. The two-hour session saw us trying to find answers to a few intriguing questions.

Officer: Looking at the Gaza sit­uation, the UN’s helplessness speaks volumes about the organi­zation’s ineffectiveness. Add into it the Ukraine war and you have a recipe of utter dismay. Millions of dollars are being spent on the UN staff to produce impractical doc­uments. I don’t think the world needs the UN anymore. In addi­tion, the kind of convoluted lan­guage they use - it makes me sick.

Me: What do you mean by con­voluted language? They are the ex­perts in the field.

Officer: After noting, welcoming, recalling, reaffirming, highlighting, commending, stressing the need for, and echoing God knows what, they call upon both sides to contin­ue to engage. What does it mean in reality? Subsequently, they would urge for the implementation of some document and request the Secretary-General to submit a re­port thereon before deciding to re­main seized of the matter. Mean­while, a whole population is being annihilated by the aggressor.

Me: That is the diction of any multilateral forum. Every word must be incorporated carefully and to the satisfaction of all present.

Officer. Exactly. The idea is not to address the issue. The objective is to keep the organization’s rele­vance intact while following the dic­tates of the powerful. Providing jus­tice would never be the aim. Then they use a whole page to say ‘may­be’ whereas the situation would de­mand a clear-cut yes or no.

Me: Taking note of something also means a kind of development. In the drafting committee, one must possess extraordinary pro­ficiency in knowledge as well as technical skills.

Officer: If this is the result of ‘ex­traordinary proficiency’ and ‘tech­nical skills’, I must say it needs a lot of courage and effort to move in circles.

Me: You are visibly disturbed. Tell me about the Foreign Office and your experience in one of the finest institutions of Pakistan.

Officer: I have come to know that our Ministry has a negligible role in the process of formulating for­eign policy. Even the consular sec­tion is not being managed proper­ly. Hence, the officers are busy in securing desirable PERs and post­ings of their choice. No one is in­terested in safeguarding the legit­imate concerns of the officers and the staff let alone promoting the national interest. The morale is at a low ebb. Those who have better options are leaving the Ministry. Those who are stuck, like me, have been left to sulk.

Me: In our days, being a diplo­mat was a matter of pride. Our Foreign Secretaries used to defend us. I remember ……

Officer: Sorry to interrupt you, Sir. Could you kindly tell me the criteria for becoming the Foreign Secretary?

Me: The best of the best, I sup­pose. I mean, whosoever is consid­ered fit for the post by the govern­ment of the day, no?

Officer: No, Sir. The would-be Foreign Secretary must either be very well-connected or should possess the eternal propensity to accept all instructions without asking any questions. As I would never be able to meet the criteria, I know I don’t stand even a chance to head the Institution.

Me: Don’t be disheartened, young man. You have just joined the Service. Give yourself some time. Meanwhile, I think, you should choose one of the specific areas on the political side and try to become an area specialist.

Officer: Area specialist? This is another illusionary paradigm. You become a UN expert after serving once in New York or Geneva. Serv­ing in the Ministry at the relevant desk also makes you an area ex­pert. Surprisingly, serving in other places don’t make you an expert or maybe you don’t want to be an area specialist in countries of Central Asia, South America, and Africa. You can easily be called a Mid-East spe­cialist if you know Arabic or have served anywhere in the region. Be­ing an expert or an area specialist is a self-created bubble, Sir. The iro­ny is that others also start believing it. Secondly, to be noticed, you must be a logophile ….!!

Me: Logophile?

Officer: Yes, Sir. Logophile. Your drafting must include a few not-so-commonly-used words like co­gnoscente, connoisseur, or crack­erjack to look authentic. Instead of saying artful, you should use ad­jectives like adroit and bravura. Include expressions like quintes­sential, circumlocution, ephemer­al, serendipity, and modus viven­di to make your draft ‘effective’. A ‘competent’ officer refrains from using ordinary words. For sweet, he will say dolce. Secretly or hid­den? No, surreptitiously. So much so that a minute-taker would not like to use the word ‘meeting’. Say­ing ‘conclave’ instead makes his draft look royal. The interesting part? No one questions that a con­clave is a specific assembly of car­dinals for the election of a pope. It cannot be an ordinary meeting.

Me: Being mindful of the relat­ed issues is the first step towards awareness. I think you already have enough know-how about the work­ings of the Ministry. You will be fine.

Officer: How could you deduce that, Sir? I think I am a complete misfit.

Me: The system teaches you cer­tain things quietly. You don’t recog­nize the change. Didn’t you use the word ‘logophile’? You could have easily said – a person who loves words….!! Trust me. You will be fine.

Najm us Saqib
The writer is a former Ambassador of Pakistan and author of eight books in three languages. He can be reached at najmussaqib1960@msn.com